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Funny Quotes

Dawson Well, all I'm saying is that I want to look back and say that I did it the best I could while I was stuck in this place. Had as much fun as I could while I was stuck in this place. Played as hard as I could while I was stuck in this place. Dogged as many girls as I could while I was stuck in this place.
Dazed and Confused
The function of a briefing paper is to prevent the ambassador from saying something dreadfully indiscreet. I sometimes think its true object is to prevent the ambassador from saying anything at all.
Kingman Brewster, Jr.
The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste, and the only limitations those of libel.
James Thurber
I wish I lived on a planet that had two suns---regular sun and 'rogue' sun. That way, when somebody asked me what time it was, I'd say, 'Regular time' And they'd say, 'Yeah.' And I'd say, 'Sorry, all I have is rogue time.' It'd be fun to be a stuck-up rogue-time guy.
Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
Acceptance without proof is the fundamental characteristic of Western religion, rejection without proof is the fundamental characteristic of Western science.
Gary Zukav
Golf is like a love affair if you don't take it seriously, it's no fun. If you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart.
Arnold Daly
It is fun to be in the same decade with you.
Franklin Delano Roosevelt
Our progress as a nation can be no swifter than our progress in education. The human mind is our fundemental resource.
John Fitzgerald Kennedy
Comedy is nothing more than tragedy deferred.
Pico Iyer
Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think.
La Bruyere
Acceptance of dissent is the fundamental requirement of a free society.
Richard Royster
Now, in reality, the world have paid too great a compliment to critics, and have imagined them to be men of much greater profundity then they really are.
Henry Fielding
The family seems to have two predominant functions to provide warmth and love in time of need and to drive each other insane.
Donald G. Smith
Where there is no belief in the soul, there is very little drama . . . . Either one is serious about salvation or one is not. And it is well to realize that the maximum amount of seriousness admits the maximum amount of comedy. Only if we are secure in our beliefs can we see the comical side of the universe.
Flannery O'Connor
If a man insisted always on being serious, and never allowed himself a bit of fun and relaxation, he would go mad or become unstable without knowing it.
Herodotus
Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.
Woody Allen
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